[Pastor Ralph]

Q1. (Ephesians 5:22-24) Why should a wife submit to her husband? According to these verses, to what degree is a wife required to submit to a husband who is not a Christian or who is a carnal Christian? Does submission mean a wife doesn't verbally disagree? What if there's a conflict with the wife's conscience?

[Commissioned]

Q1. (Ephesians 5:22-24) Why should a wife submit to her husband?
A wife should submit herself to her husband because she is instructed to do so as she would to the Lord. The husband's position to her is the same as Christ's to His Church.

According to these verses, to what degree is a wife required to submit to a husband who is not a Christian or who is a carnal Christian?
A wife is required to submit to her husband in everything. But to a husband who is a non-Christian or one who is carnal, her first responsibility is to her God. If her husband requires of her something that goes against her conscience or is blatantly immoral she should respectfully decline and state her reasons so as to be a good witness to the Word of God.

Does submission mean a wife doesn't verbally disagree?
No, submission does not mean that a wife should not verbally disagree with her husband. In instances where the wife has privileged knowledge on the issue the husband should defer to his wife for guidance in that instance. When a wife can use her knowledge to make her husband look good she should do so respectfully and the husband should accept it humbly so that both esteem the other.

What if there's a conflict with the wife's conscience?
If there's a conflict with the wife's conscience she should recognize this and prayerfully submit to the guidance of the Holy Spirit.

[cct1106]

Wives should be in subjection to their husbands. Regardless of the husband spiritually, husband is the head and the wife must recognize headship. Wives can verbally disagree but in a loving and mild manner. If there is a conscience conflict, pray about it, take a look at what needs to be addressed, ask yourself questions and then talk it over.

[BJB123]

1)A wife should submit to the husband the same as Christ is the head of the church and we submit to Christ.
2)If the husband is not a christian or is carnal minded, then, the wife needs to try and explain to the husband in a kind and caring manner how submitting to his wishes on a certain situation could cause her to sin against God. The wife submits first to God in all situations. The wife can be a great tool in winning the husband to the Lord by living a Godly life and showing by her actions that the husband will no doubt come to know the Lord. The wife will need to to pray and ask God through the Holy Spirit for guidance and direction.
3)The wife can verbally agree to disagree with the husband. Most husbands lean on their wifes for knowledge and guidance and help with their marriage and family.
4)If a wife feels conflict with the husband and her conscience in knowing something is wrong, then she needs to pray and seek God's direction through the Holy Spirit.

[revmrf]

Q1. (Ephesians 5:22-24) Why should a wife submit to her husband? According to these verses, to what degree is a wife required to submit to a husband who is not a Christian or who is a carnal Christian? Does submission mean a wife doesn't verbally disagree? What if there's a conflict with the wife's conscience?

“Who’s in charge here?” And let all the men say, “I am!”

I’m afraid that I’m going to share some thoughts, here, that may go against the grain of understanding or interpretation of some on this passage. My resources are, of course, our holy scriptures and 49 years of marriage where my wife and I have learned much in our study and relationship. BTW, we aren’t fully perfected in this world as yet, but maybe someday… 

It’s been somewhat amazing to me how much is written and talked amongst men about, “Wives, submit to your husband, as to the Lord” [Eph. 5:22] and so little is discussed about “Submit to one another out of reverence to Christ.” [Eph. 5:21] Why is this? And, why is it that in most translations these two sentences [verses] are separated with a similar inserted comment by the translators “Wives and Husbands,” as in the NIV? Did St Paul intend for this separation or is this insertion an indication of something else?

Might there have been something else going on in the background in the Ephesian church or in the other churches receiving St Paul’s teaching? Had this new teaching about what the believer had in Christ, his/her position in Christ, authority in Christ, equality in Christ, living as children in the light, the new creation, grace and love so excited many in the church that a bit of chaos in relationships and responsibilities had begun to surface? Therefore Paul writes, “Submit to one another out of reverence to Christ.” If both parties, husband and wife, are in submission to one another, a mutuality exists and a peaceful loving relationship will follow.

Therefore, I believe the words “Submit to one another out of reverence to Christ” needs overarching emphasis and priority in regards to St Paul’s words about family relationships that shortly follow. In short, I believe Ephesians 5:21 should bracket Ephesians 5:22 to Ephesians 6:9 in that there is a new principle at work now, in the new covenant.

Why should a wife submit to her husband? The word of God says so. My question is: Should a husband submit to his wife? I believe that is expected, also.

To what degree? Conflicts of conscience? Disagreement? The difficulty is if submission encompasses something that is against biblical principles. In that case, I believe that some sort of knowledgeable negotiations need to be made and worked out. Of course, negotiations may be impossible. Even amongst believers this is a fact. If an impasse exists and one has gone as far as he/she can, the husbands point of view carries and, he is ultimately responsible for his actions.

Abuse is another whole issue, here. The abusee will need to get help ASAP. While physical abuse has dire consequences, verbal abuse needs to be dealt with as well.

I could go on and on. I would appreciate any comments.

[BJB123]

This is in response to revmrf. I whole heartedly agree with you. I too, have been married 49 1/2 years. Got an anniversary in May. Will be 50th. I agree with you. I thank God everyday for my husband. No one said Marriage would be easy. I have found that it is something you have to work on daily just as Christians have to work on their relationship with God and their walk with the Lord. You have to work on your marriage (young folks) Work on your marriage. I thank God my husband and I both are Christians. We did not start our walk, however, with the Lord until October, 1995. I can tell you this: God got hold of both of us like a whirlwind and began using us in a strong and mighty way. So Brother (revmrf), I agree with what you wrote in your reply.
God bless you. We need to pray for the young people today that they to will work on their marriage as they do the Christian walk./////BJB123

[Ken7]

It is Gods desire and will. God gives each person in relationships unique roles and responsibilities, just as He did with His Son and Holy Spirit. Our creator is not a God of chaos - but a God who created order and harmony. Evil wants to change these into their opposites. My role does NOT make me number one in our relationship. God is #1. We are each under His leadership.

[Helenmm]

Q1. (Ephesians 5:22-24) Why should a wife submit to her husband? According to these verses, to what degree is a wife required to submit to a husband who is not a Christian or who is a carnal Christian? Does submission mean a wife doesn't verbally disagree? What if there's a conflict with the wife's conscience?

A wife should submit to her husband because you can't have unity when two people are pulling in opposite directions and he has final responsibility to God. She is largely responsible for creating the unity in the family, although he has some responsibility in this too, but his is different. Particularly in front of the children they must present a united front or the children will play on their differences.

A wife needs to submit in all respects unless he is proposing something that is sin in the eyes of God. She may (and should) present her arguments to her husband, but in the end the decision is his. If his decision does not respect God's laws then she may say that she cannot go along with it.

Submission does not mean that she is always in total agreement - she is entitled to have her say, and really to be heard by her husband, who, if he is a wise man (and many are not) will listen. But, seeing they can't both make opposite decisions, the task falls in the husband's hands.

Conflict with conscience means that the wife may explain her feelings and, if it is real conscience 9not just feelings) she may desist gently and take an alternative path in deference to God.

[JustJeff]

If, as a Christian, a woman agrees to marry a man under the tenets of our faith, then she is bound to submit to the authority that God has given him as a husband. This authority is not of that as a dictator, but as an equal and the one in the family who has a final say on common matters.
For a woman who has chosen a non Christian as a husband she is unequally yoked and must come to terms with that. She is obedient to her husband to the degree that she does not compromise her integrity before God and put her salvation at risk.
As equals, both parties have the right to disagree but, a decision needs to be made and ultimately the husband should take responsibilty for the final choice, right or wrong.
For consciences sake, prayer is always the answer. It is always the solution.

[Lisa Rupert]

Q1. (Ephesians 5:22-24) Why should a wife submit to her husband?
Because it is written in the word that the wife should submit to her husband. Eph 5:24 "Now as the church submits to Christ so should the wife submit to her husband in everything." For the husband is the "head" of the wife, as Christ is the head of the church.

According to these verses, to what degree is a wife required to submit to a husband who is not a Christian or who is a carnal Christian?
A wife should not compromise her families well being in submission to her husband, but she should respectfully try to help him to see the errors of his ways without putting him down, she should build her husband up in all that he is.

Does submission mean a wife doesn't verbally disagree?
Submission does not mean obedience, it means that she is to work with building her husband in all things. She is to respect him meaning she can respectfully disagree but she should use loving kindness in guiding him into a understanding.

What if there's a conflict with the wife's conscience?
If there is a conflict she should pray about it and work with his husband in understanding with love and faith that he will come to terms with his decision.

[revmrf]

This is in response to revmrf. I whole heartedly agree with you. I too, have been married 49 1/2 years. Got an anniversary in May. Will be 50th. I agree with you. I thank God everyday for my husband. No one said Marriage would be easy. I have found that it is something you have to work on daily just as Christians have to work on their relationship with God and their walk with the Lord. You have to work on your marriage (young folks) Work on your marriage. I thank God my husband and I both are Christians. We did not start our walk, however, with the Lord until October, 1995. I can tell you this: God got hold of both of us like a whirlwind and began using us in a strong and mighty way. So Brother (revmrf), I agree with what you wrote in your reply.
God bless you. We need to pray for the young people today that they to will work on their marriage as they do the Christian walk./////BJB123

Thank you, BJB123. I just came back from a marriage retreat with 35 National Guard soldiers who had returned from combat in Iraq and Afghanistan and their spouses. The focus was on giving tools for communication ... listening [how to] and how to work through conflict [that occurs in every marriage] with one's spouse. I believe one of the tools of submission is learning how to listen. 'Listen to each other in submission to Christ?' Blessings in Christ.

[Eudora]

Q1. (Ephesians 5:22-24) Why should a wife submit to her husband? I have to back up a bit in this passage because we miss one very important tid bit , if we just pass over it with out giving it the importance it deserves. Starting with verse 15:
See then that ye walk circumspectly, not as fools, but as wise, Redeeming the time, because the days are evil. Wherefore be ye not unwise, but understanding what the will of the Lord is. And be not drunk with wine, wherein is excess; but be filled with the Spirit; Speaking to yourselves in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing and making melody in your heart to the Lord; Giving thanks always for all things unto God and the Father in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ; Submitting yourselves one to another in the fear of God.

To walk in the light of truth, we must be wise and understand the will of our Father. We are to be spirit filled women that submit to our husbands. We are to always have a song making a melody in our heart to The Lord. We are to be constantly giving thanks for our husbands and in awe of The Lord our God. This book called The Bible is written for the believer. It is revealed to the spirit filled believer. Any woman coming along who would read this would think it rubbish to be in submission to her husband because she would not be first in submission to God. When God spoke to the woman in the garden, He told her that she would desire to be head of her husband, but that her husband would rule over her. The order of things the way it is now is because the rule of order was messed up at the fall of man, but God set the order in which He intended the rule to be followed. God set the standard of which He expects to be followed in obedience to Him and not in that to our husband.

According to these verses, to what degree is a wife required to submit to a husband who is not a Christian or who is a carnal Christian? Does submission mean a wife doesn't verbally disagree? What if there's a conflict with the wife's conscience?

Paul is sharing with us that we as spirit filled women, must remember our place in God’s order and we are to be in submission to God first and to our husbands as if they are under God. It doesn’t matter if our husbands are in submission to God, we as spirit filled women are. We must always remember and I am speaking here to myself right now that we are to be imitators of Christ. As spirit filled women, we must demonstrate a self sacrificial love.
We are already under Christ’s authority. I think we as spirit filled women can seek God’s advice on how to handle matters with out going off the deep end and spewing our grand notions all over our husbands, just because we don’t agree. Our conscience is in submission to the Holy Spirit, who is our teacher, who is standing in the stead of the Flesh of God, who once walked upon this earth in the body of Jesus Christ. A wife’s voluntary submission arises out of her own submission to Christ. We can listen to our husband out of respect. When we listen again, to what our husband says with the ear of our spirit, we may hear something all to differently and may actually not disagree with him. It’s all in the attitude and the approach. Listen and then listen again before we choose to disagree is very good advice. Other wise our sorrows may be greatly multiplied. “Much easier said than done, but practice makes … practice makes…
Practice leads us onto the path of righteneousness..”

We also must keep in our hearts very wise teachings and that is that satan knows that the strange woman, the seductress is always out there ready to smote our husbands with her kind words. If we beat her to the punch and slap satan sideways before he sets us up for a repeat of his fall, we will be much mightier women in the eyes of our husbands. Proverbs 2:16 To deliver thee from the strange woman, even from the stranger which flattereth with her words;

A virtuous woman takes care to speak well to her husband before he hears the slick oiled tongue of the seductress.

Proverbs 31:26 She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness.

[kiqstart]

Q1. (Ephesians 5:22-24) Why should a wife submit to her husband? According to these verses, to what degree is a wife required to submit to a husband who is not a Christian or who is a carnal Christian? Does submission mean a wife doesn't verbally disagree? What if there's a conflict with the wife's conscience?

She is instructed to by the bible, she is still required to submit to her husband, however she does not have to do anything she thinks is immoral or goes against the teachings of Jesus Christ. She may verbally disagree with her husband and if there is a conflict with her conscience she should pray for her husband

[PCHRIS]

I have had a number of [err] discussions over this passage and I have used the Galatians passage [3:28] which empthasizes that man and woman have a perfect spiritual equality but also point out the following passage, 1Corinthians 7:3-5, here Paul pleads for a true mutuality in the physical relationship. Netherless in the family, for its order and its unity, there must be leadership, and the responsibilty of leadership is that of the husband and father, and his authority must be accepted unless of course it contradicts or undermines her faith or the Word of God

[Stan]

Q1. (Ephesians 5:22-24) Why should a wife submit to her husband? According to these verses, to what degree is a wife required to submit to a husband who is not a Christian or who is a carnal Christian? Does submission mean a wife doesn't verbally disagree? What if there's a conflict with the wife's conscience?

Mainly because it is the right thing to do and its is what God wants her to do. She should submit only as her wifely duties and good consience tells her to if she is faithful the Holy Spirit will lead and guide her in whats is right. If her husband is not a Christian then she should continue to submit but again look to be lead by the Spirit to onvert him by her faithfulness.
No, She can disagree and express her opinion and allow the Holy Spirit to lead her and help her chose when to disagree and lead her in her responses. She should always allow the consience to be her guide because it is the Holy Spirit convicting her in the way that is right.

[masika]

Awife should submit to her husband because according to the Bible the man is the Spiritual head of the family , and his wife should acknowledge his leadership .
A wife should willingly follow her husband's leadership in Christ , if it is outside God's law or rules then she should not obey him.
Submission is voluntary cooperation with someone , first out of love and respect for God and then out of Love and respect for that person. Submitting to unbelievers is difficult , but it is vital part of leading them to Jesus Christ . We are not called to submit to nonbelievers to the point that we compromise our relationship with God but we must look for every opportunity to humbly serve in power of God's Spirit.

[charisbarak]

A wife should submit to her husband because God asked her to submit. I believe it is a protection for the wife as the husband needs to be in submission to God.

A wife should submit as long as she is not asked to do something immoral, unlawful or dangerous.

Submission does not imply she should not disagree & give her reasons for believing so. But the key is to do it with a good, loving attitude, ready to accept her husband's final decision.

If there is a conflict with her conscience, then by all means, she can say she cannot do that particular thing--and let him know her conscience will not allow her to do it.

[June]

God placed him head of the household. Every home needs a leader. God sees it as part of her obedience to Jesus, as to the Lord.
She is to love, respect and be a helpmate to him. Wives are to submit to their husbands in everything. Husbands are not to be bossy. They are to exercise love, gentleness and consideration in their headship.
A wife can verbally disagree but still submit to him. He is the one to which God holds accountable, if the wife is doing all she is suppose to do. The wife is to take everything to God in prayer and seek answers this way.

[sis. dee]

Q1. (Ephesians 5:22-24) Why should a wife submit to her husband? According to these verses, to what degree is a wife required to submit to a husband who is not a Christian or who is a carnal Christian? Does submission mean a wife doesn't verbally disagree? What if there's a conflict with the wife's conscience?

The wife should submit to her husband because he is the head of the household, as Cfhrist is head of the Church.

The wife husband is still head of the household, but she should submit as long as she is not asked to do something immoral, unlawful or dangerous, dhe would have to tell him in a loving and wise way that she could not do this.

The wife still can be submissive and does not have to verbally disagress.

If there is a conflict with the wife conscience then she should go to God in prayer about the matter.