[Pastor Ralph]

Q2. (Matthew 1:19) What were Mary's options being pregnant and carrying a baby not her husband's? What kind of character did Joseph exhibit by deciding to divorce Mary quietly and leniently?

[UncleBlake]

Q2. (Matthew 1:19) What were Mary's options being pregnant and carrying a baby not her husband's? What kind of character did Joseph exhibit by deciding to divorce Mary quietly and leniently?

As it says in the text, in Matthew 1:19, Joseph was a righteous man, meaning he was one who wanted to do what was right and best for the both of them. He didn't want to go against the law, according to the laws and the social more's of the time, he could not marry Mary and maintain his status socially nor legally seeing the unborn child was not his. Joseph saught the only thing, (not yet knowing who the unborn child was) he could possibly do. Mary's options were even less. Women in those days didn't have equal status to men, and had to remain either in their familial home or in thier husband's home and out of the public eye. Mary could have run away, but as discussed in the lesson her only option was to find work as a house maid or prostitute, and neither would do. She was at a crux where the only thing she could do was rely on God to take care of her.

[Elwood C O'Dell]

Mary’s options were grim and extremely limited. She could expect her husband to disown or divorce her. She could be stoned, or shunned. She would not have the option of remarriage and to live alone as a single woman just didn’t happen in the society of that day.

When Joseph decided to divorce Mary in such a way as to protect her and in a way that was best for her, he showed that he was a man of great maturity and gentleness. Joseph was a man of extremely high character.

[Bro Steven]

Mary's options were very few she probbably prayed that Joseph woul not have her stonned which under the Law would be the judgement. If she were to run away she would not make it in a world that the man worked and provided and not the woman.

Joseph was according to the Bible was a just man he could have put her to death by stonning but he elected to put her away privetly. But he obeyed his heart and keep her for his wife. Joseph was a wise and loving man a man of great characted.

[love.serve.know]

One option would be to trust fully in God - which is what she did do. It's easy for us to look back in time and know that that is the right thing to do, but I'm sure it wasn't so easy then. Any other options (working for rich people, being shunned) would have been grim for a single, young woman. Joseph was obviously hand picked by God because God knew he would take Mary as his wife, wait until she had the baby to know her in the Biblical sense, and respect her. Again, it's easy for us to look back in time and know that he did the right thing, but I wonder how he was guided in making his decision and how long he struggled for the right answer. I think for both Mary and Joseph, being visited by an angel was the thing that caused them to make the right decision. I think if I were visited by an angel I would be very careful to obey everything God wanted me to do.

[les]

mary had very little options .at this point in time women were totally dependent on men for survival,. marriage was the way to a secure future unfortunately being pregnant and not yet married was a crime punishable by death (stoning) or being shunned by all family and society. since women had no careers then all that would be available for someone so disgraced would be servanthood or prostitution.the shame and stigma attached to this transgression was total. joseph being a righteous man must have desired to act in keeping with the law especially as it must have seemed to him that he had been made a fool off by his promised bride.but even if his pride and honor was attacked he still cared enough for mary to consider the disgrace she would face. so he decided to spare her the dishonor and just put her aside gently on other pretext by releasing her through a quiet divorce. i would say joseph was most gracious inspite of the circumstances he faced and tempered justice with love

[davidjjj]

Q2. (Matthew 1:19) What were Mary's options being pregnant and carrying a baby not her husband's?

Really there was very little in the way of options, stoned or shunned by community, no option of remarriage, servant hood or prostitution –Mary trusted God and He provided a way between a rock and a hard place.

What kind of character did Joseph exhibit by deciding to divorce Mary quietly and leniently?

Joseph’s kindness is clearly evident, I suppose some angered fiancés of the time could have invoked death (Dt 22:23-24), calling attention to their betrothed's sinfulness and commanded stoning (see John 8) but Joe was a righteous & compassionate man (Mat 1:19) not a legalistic or vengeful man.

[Craig]

Q2. (Matthew 1:19) What were Mary's options being pregnant and carrying a baby not her husband's? What kind of character did Joseph exhibit by deciding to divorce Mary quietly and leniently?

Mary's options were nil. She faced the possible rejection of Jospeph and she was not remarriageable; she faced possible shunning from family and community; she faced the possibility of a tainted, runined reputation and the possbility of being stoned. At that period of time in Palestine she really didn't have any options. She was at the mercy of Joseph.

Joseph displayed great love, mercy, kindness, maturity and righteousness in deciding to divorce Mary quietly and leniently. Joseph's desire to do the right thing was an integral part of his character. A reflection of of His relationship with God and God's influence in his life.

[masika]

Q2. (Matthew 1:19) What were Mary's options being pregnant and
carrying a baby not her husband's? What kind of character did
Joseph exhibit by deciding to divorce Mary quietly and leniently?
As a young unmarried girl who become pregnant risked disaster. Unless the father of the child agreed to marry her, she would have probably remain unmarried for life. If her own father rejected her, she could be forced into prostitution in order to earn her living. And Mary, with her story about becoming pregnant by the Holy Spirit, risked being considered crazy as well.
Joseph was a man of integrity, God gave him the third option when he was planning to divorce Mary quietly.
God often shows us that there are more options available than we think. Although Joseph seemed to be doing the right thing by breaking the engagement, only God’s guidance helped him make the best decision.

[sjb]

What were Mary's options being pregnant and carrying a baby not her husband's? What kind of character did Joseph exhibit by deciding to divorce Mary quietly and leniently?

Well, Mary actually had just one option that would work and that was to obey God. God took care of everything else, including choosing Joseph as Jesus' earthly father. Anything else would have led to ruin--she could have been stoned--or had her family's reputation ruined. These would have been about the only options. A woman could not have a child and raise it alone as some do now. Oh, don't you know there were wagging tongues?? My mother-in-law once told me about two old women in the neighborhood where I live now. She said that as soon as the two heard of a marriage, they marked it on their calendars so they could compare that date with the birthdate of the couple's first child! I am sure there were women like that in Jesus' day, too.

Joseph's character is without blemish. I don't believe there would have been many men who would have stood so loyally and lovingly by Mary. I believe that he was obedient to God and that he loved Mary with all his heart--even if the marriage had been an arranged one. Come to think of it, don't you think God had done that "arranging" from the very beginning even if the characters in question were unaware of it? As I said in Q.1, I believe Joseph was chosen by God just as carefully as Mary was chosen.

Back to the introductory sentence here: Mary actually had just one option. What options do we have in our daily living?? I think the same as Mary--otherwise our lives can become screwed-up messes that only God can untangle.

[SojournersHeart]

Mary didn't have very good options--she could be stoned by the village if Joseph had desired it--not her option but his--surviving that option, she could live in shame under her parent's protection, but shunned by the village. She could have gone back to Elizabeth, who was already convinced that Mary's pregnancy was miraculous rather than moral failure. The other option open to other young women in her apparent situation would be to sell herself as a servant if anyone would take her or to give up to a life of anonymity and prostitution in a large city far away, but I don't think that was really an option for Mary. I wonder, if Joseph had divorced her quietly if she would have sought the protection of Zechariah and Elizabeth. I think a good point is made in the above post, that God had already worked out the details....Perhaps that is true in our own lives and what gets us into trouble is taking things into our own hands.

I think Joseph understood the spirit of the Jewish Law as Jesus later taught it--that the Law requires first that we love God, second that we love our neighbor as ourselves. Joseph's righteousness was a meeting of justice and mercy. His sense of Justice told him Mary had broken the law and was no longer worthy of his engagement, but his sense of mercy told him to spare her life and her dignity (as much as was in his power) as well, by being as lenient as he could be in following the law. In the eyes of the community, Joseph would have been justified in seeking vindication (and in fact would have expected it or even thought him week for not seeking the full extent of the law), but he was willing to set aside his pride and pain and do what was best for Mary.

Sometimes when my daughter is upset because she has made a mess of things, I try to offer comfort and she says, "but I don't deserve it." Lately I have been telling her "it's not about what you deserve; it's about what you need." Joseph did not give Mary what she appeared to deserve, he wanted to give her what she needed.

[JustJeff]

Mary's options were extremely limited. She risked being stoned to death, living as an outcast and discraced.
As they say in Hebrew, Joseph was a tzaddik, a righteous or just man.

[ljc]

For some reason, I do not think there was another option for Mary. She had taken the responsiblity on with complete faith that God knew the plan..............Joseph was not going to hurt Mary...........he was very kind, but he was thinking of a low-keyed divorce to release both of them from the problem. In the dream, Joseph understands that is not his option for God has indeed made other plans.

[Dar]

Q2. (Matthew 1:19) What were Mary's options being pregnant and carrying a baby not her husband's? She could have been stoned, Joseph could have divorced her, leaving her with a stigma of shame that would follow her, she could have faced this period alone, alone as far as the world goes.

But, Mary didn't give it a second thought, she believed the truth spoken to her. Mary, a true believer in God Almighty, relied on her "faith" and "trust" in the true God, the God that she loved; As we see in the words Mary spoke, the words that came from her heart, "My soul doth magnify the Lord, and my spirit hath rejoiced in God my Saviour." (God elected Mary for just a time as this, and her soul chose to magnify the Lord)---- A good lesson for us, when what seems to be the impossible comes our way, will we still choose to magnify the Lord, stay in "faith?

What kind of character did Joseph exhibit by deciding to divorce Mary quietly and leniently?
Joseph was espoused to Mary, as far as the law goes, legally married; but! consummation was not to happen until the marriage festival. It was during this period, if for any reason one felt they could not be married to the other, they could divorce.

Joseph loved Mary and wanted to live with her the rest of his life! He had chosen her to be his wife.
At first he thought of divorcing Mary and doing it quietly, this is a sign of a righteous man. He could have charged her with immorality, thinking only about himself, how could she have done such a thing?

Joseph decided he would show mercy to Mary. BUT, Joseph was not sure about divorcing the woman he loved, the women he knew loved God, Joseph spent time thinking on this, giving it much thought, "is this what I want, how can this be, can I put Mary away? -- Joseph's character stands out, he wanted to do the right thing, this is what righterousness is all about, this is why Joseph gave it much thought, he wanted to do what was right, this is what love does too, this is why God tells us to "love one another." It is a sign of a righteous person.

[Sherylle Ladner]

Q2. (Matthew 1:19) What were Mary's options being pregnant and carrying a baby not her husband's? Mary's options were very limited. She could have been stoned, shunned, or left without a home. Yes, Joseph could have divorced her and she could not remarry.



What kind of character did Joseph exhibit by deciding to divorce Mary quietly and leniently? Joseph was a righteous man. He wanted to do right before the eyes of his people and the Jewish law. He did not want to bring shame on Mary and her family.

[Tracy m]

Q2. (Matthew 1:19) What were Mary's options being pregnant and carrying a baby not her husband's? What kind of character did Joseph exhibit by deciding to divorce Mary quietly and leniently?

To be honest I choose to believe Mary didn't even consider alternatives... I think she just heard and responded with a servants heart... she said yes and was prepared to trust in her God and let the chips fall.
On a practical level I guess she was looking at death by stoning on the one hand but as Joseph was the type of man he was, she would have been abandoned to parent the child alone as a divorced woman finding work as a servant or as a prostitute...?

Joseph demonstrates a noble, generous, honourable character... he planned to protect Mary, release her quietly. He was indeed a righteous man.

[Lisa Rupert]

Q2. (Matthew 1:19) What were Mary's options being pregnant and carrying a baby not her husband's? What kind of character did Joseph exhibit by deciding to divorce Mary quietly and leniently?
Mary would face rejection from her husband, embarrasment, her family would be shamed, she could be stoned, she would be labeled as an adulterer, she would be shunned and because of all of this she would not be able to remarry because everyone in the town knew of her indiscretion, she couldn't move away and live along because women didn't live along in those days.
Joseph was a righteous man who only wanted to do what was right, he loved Mary but he loved God too. He didn't want to hurt her that is why he was going to quietly divorce her because all of this which went against the Jewish law that Joseph followed righteously. He just wanted to do the right thing for Mary and what he believed that would be pleasing to God.

[mags]

Mary had very little options to her because of the pregnancy. She could be stoned but she probably realised that she wouldn't because of the things the angel had told her. She knew that she would probably be raising this baby on her own and all she cold do was to trust in God. This situation was where God had called her to be and he would provide.

How often do we think that God's calling on us is the way out? We know that He has a plan but often when we say yes to Him and what He wants us to do, we expect it to be easy - we expect the hard part is submitting to His will. Here Mary said 'Yes Lord' and was then faced with persecution and even death. She was face with no one to support her and having a baby! This is a huge lesson to us in submission to God - to trust Him and His plan.

Joseph was a righteous, loving man who wanted to protect Mary as much as he could given the circumstances. He obviously felt for her and the stiutation she was in, even though he was probably disappointed, angry and hurt himself. He was showing God's love to Mary at this time.

[macygrover]

2a) that mary was to carry the child or god would find another

2b) Then Joseph her husband, being a just man, and not willing to make her a public example, was minded to put her away privily. Matt. 1:19

[KAFWEMBE]

Q2. (Matthew 1:19) What were Mary's options being pregnant and carrying a baby not her husband's? What kind of character did Joseph exhibit by deciding to divorce Mary quietly and leniently?

The options were very limited since the family set up was very tight. She was going to be an outcast in society either ending up as a maid servant or a prostitute, both of whom were the lowest positions in society.

Joseph exhibited maturity in his actions. He did not panick but looked at Mary as a fellow human being who needed to be treated as such despite her short comings. He weighed the situation he found himsef in so that he could end up doing the right thing that did not put Mary at risk.