Bereavement and Depression, Fear and Hope, Exposition of Genesis 37-47

Life of Jacob E-mail Bible Study

Bereavement and Depression, Fear and Hope
Genesis 37-47

An exposition by Dr. Ralph F. Wilson

The next phase of Jacob's life is a time of bereavement and fear, of sadness and a kind of fatalist attitude towards life. Jacob has largely retired, and his sons have taken over the day-to-day duties of caring for the flocks and herds. The true love of Jacob's life, Rachel, has died in childbirth, leaving only her young child Benjamin and teenager Joseph to remember her by. Something about Jacob seems paralyzed by Rachel's death. Something has died within him, and he lives on only in the life of her children.

In this lesson we'll be covering a great deal of ground, skipping over the details of Esau (ch. 36), Judah and Tamar (ch. 38), and much of Joseph's life (chs. 39-45). But we'll be stopping to see Jacob at various points, to understand what is going on in him, and what God does about it.

The Loss of Joseph (chapter 37)

Joseph is the apple of Jacob's eye, and the young man is granted a kind of special status far above his older brothers, causing tremendous resentment among them. At 17, he is out tending the flocks with his half-brothers. When something doesn't go his way, or when they do something behind their father's back, Joseph is the tattle-tale -- and their father believes Joseph! (37:2)

In his grief, Jacob makes the serious error of displaying openly his preference for one son over another. Now that Rachel is gone, his love and attention shifts to her son. On some special occasion, Jacob presents Joseph with what the King James Version calls a "coat of many colors" (vs. 3). The exact translation of the Hebrew isn't certain: NIV terms it "a richly ornamented robe." Victor P. Hamilton calls it "a long colorful tunic." In 2 Samuel 13:18, a garment so named was royal apparel. Whatever it was exactly, it was special, far above what Jacob had ever given Joseph's brothers. Jacob may have made it himself for his son, which made it doubly special.

"When his brothers saw that their father loved him more than any of them, they hated him and could not speak a kind word to him" (vs. 4). Jacob should have known better. His own father Isaac had made Esau his obvious favorite. He knew how it felt to be less loved. He had seen how this selective love had caused hatred and threats of violence in his own case. But Jacob continued in his selective love and sowed the seeds of murder in his own family, too.

Jacob's favorite son was not only a tattletale, he was also a dreamer. Joseph told his brothers of seeing their sheaves of grain in the field bowing down to his sheaf. Their hatred grew. Next he dreamed of the sun and moon and eleven stars bowing down to him. Jacob himself rebukes Joseph: "What is this dream you had? Will your mother and I and your brothers actually come and bow down to the ground before you?" But though he rebukes his son, yet he keeps wondering: What did this mean?

The older sons had gone north to graze the flocks near Shechem, so Jacob sends Joseph to make sure all is well with them. When they see him coming, their hatred boils over: "When they saw him in the distance, and before he reached them, they plotted to kill him. 'Here comes that dreamer....'" (37:18-19) Finally, they decide to dispose of him by selling him to a caravan of Ishmaelites, Midianites headed for Egypt.

The beautiful coat is dipped in goat's blood and brought to their father. "We found this," they say. "Look to see whether it's your son's robe." They don't tell Jacob any lies. They don't have to. Jacob creates his own horrible story of his beloved son's death: "It is my son's robe! Some ferocious animal has devoured him. Joseph has surely been torn to pieces" (37:33).

Jacob's heart and mind seem to stop, and now the old patriarch is overcome with grief and loss. "Jacob tore his clothes, and put on sackcloth, and mourned for his son for many days. All his sons and daughters came to comfort him, but he refused to be comforted" (37:34-35). A picture of inconsolable grief, Jacob is broken in spirit. His sons' deed of bitterness has not only destroyed their hated brother, but also the father that loved him too much. "In mourning will I go down to the grave to my son," Jacob says, and weeps. In the unbearable weight of his sadness, only in his young son Benjamin does he find some comfort; Benjamin is the little bit of Rachel's memory that still lives.

Joseph's Fortunes in Egypt (chapters 39-41)

The boy who was too big for his britches, who was king of the mountain in his father's home, is now a slave, but rises quickly under God's blessing. He is sold as slave to Pharaoh's captain of the guard and is promoted to manage Potiphar's entire estate. When the nobleman's wife tries to seduce him, his sense of honor and responsibility cause him to flee from her, and when the rejected mistress accuses him of attempted rape, he is thrown into prison under her husband's jurisdiction where Pharaoh's prisoners were confined.

Joseph's faithfulness and abilities cause him to gain the trust of the warden who sets him over the whole prison, though he is still confined. When Pharaoh's cupbearer is thrown in prison for offending the king, Joseph interprets dreams that come to pass exactly as Joseph had predicted. Two years later, when Pharaoh is troubled by dreams, the cupbearer remembers Joseph and sends for him to help.

"The seven fat cows in your dream are seven years of abundance," says Joseph, "while the seven gaunt cows are seven years of famine. Let Pharaoh appoint a man to take a fifth of the seven abundant harvests and store them away in granaries so that the country may not starve during the seven years of famine." Pharaoh sees God's hand in the interpretation and appoints Joseph himself to his task. In a single day he moves from being prison trustee to second in command over all Egypt.

Famine and Grain (chapter 42)

The years of plenty are a time of abundance, but when the famine comes, a drought grips the entire region. In Canaan the harvests are meager, and Jacob can buy no food despite his wealth. There is less and less food to be had until Jacob's clan is faced with starvation and death. Jacob's sons seem powerless to do anything.

"Why do you just keep looking at each other?" says Jacob one day. "I have heard that there is grain in Egypt. Go down there and buy some for us, so that we may live and not die" (42:2). Jacob may have been passive when Dinah had been raped, but he takes the lead now.

So ten of the brothers go to Egypt to buy grain, leaving young Benjamin at home with their father, "because he was afraid that harm might come to him" (42:4). Did Jacob suspect that Joseph had come to his death at their hands years before? We don't know.

When the brothers arrive in Egypt, Joseph recognizes them. He questions them closely about his father and younger brother Benjamin. "You're spies!" he says. Then to test them, he demands that one remain as hostage until the younger brother is brought with them to prove their story. He detains Simeon in prison, and sends the others back home with sacks full of grain. But curiously, he returns each man's silver and has his servants bury it in each man's sacks of grain.

When they reach home and begin to empty their sacks, the pouches of silver coin fall out. None returns home without his silver. The grain is theirs for free.

Fear, Blame, and Stubbornness (42:35 - 43:14)

"When they and their father saw the money pouches," the scripture says, "they were frightened" (42:35)

Fear turns to blame, as Jacob turns on his sons: "You have deprived me of my children. Joseph is no more and Simeon is no more, and now you want to take Benjamin. Everything is against me!" (42:36)

This is paranoia fed by depression. Jacob's life in the last few years has experienced more loss than he can endure. His mother, his mother's nurse, his Rachel, his father, his beloved son Joseph have all left him, and now Benjamin, all he has left, will be taken from him. So he turns to blaming his sons for all his woes. "Everything is against me!"

Have you ever been overtaken by depression? Has your heart ever been broken by loss, your world shattered by death. Your world suddenly shrinks to only you and what it means to you. You against the world.

It's amazing that the patriarch Jacob is not whitewashed as his story is retold again and again until it is finally written down in the book of Genesis. You'd think that all the negatives about this legendary ancestor would be stricken from the record as a slave people sought to glorify their past. But no, the character seems very real. Too real, if you've ever felt what Jacob is feeling, if you've ever been depressed.

"You may put both of my sons to death," says Reuben, "if I do not bring Benjamin back to you" (42:38).

"My son will not go down there with you," Jacob retorts. "His brother is dead and he is the only one left." The only loved brother, Jacob could have said. His obvious favoritism must hurt the other brothers.

"If harm comes to him on the journey you are taking, you will bring my gray head down to the grave in sorrow." Jacob is thinking only of himself and how this might affect him. He is consumed by self-pity.

But events have a way of forcing us to do what we've sworn we'd never do. The famine continues unabated, and the grain from their sacks is finally depleted.

"Go back and buy us a little more food," Jacob says to his sons.

"Don't you remember, Dad, what the man said. He won't give us food unless we bring our brother."

"Why did you tell him you even had another brother?" says Jacob in reproof. You can tell that this is just the flare-up of an argument that has continued periodically for the past year.

"The man questioned us closely about our family," replies Judah. "How did we know he would say, 'Bring your brother down here'?"

Their children are slowly starving and their father is quibbling about Benjamin. It is almost more than the sons can bear.

Now Judah offers to take personal responsibility for Benjamin. "I myself will guarantee his safety; you can hold me personally responsible for him."

Jacob finally relents. "If it must be, then do this..." and he tells them how to appease their enemy, much as he had once appeased his brother Esau. They prepare a pitiful gift, "a little balm and a little honey, some spices and myrrh, some pistachio nuts and almonds."

"Take double the amount of silver with you, for you must return the silver that was put back into your sacks," adds Jacob. It has been nearly a full year, we assume, since the first trip to Egypt for food. How would a busy administrator dealing with thousands of starving people remember that a few foreigners were sent off with their money still in its pouches? But Jacob the deceiver is changed. He may be depressed and overcome with loss, but he is now honest.

"Take your brother also and go back to the man at once." Now that his mind is made up, he is ready to execute the plan immediately. There is no time for dithering. If it must be done, it must be done at once.

"And may God Almighty grant you mercy before the man so that he will let your other brother and Benjamin come back with you." Here it is finally, a prayer to God Almighty, El Shaddai. Jacob has grieved and blamed, but now he turns to God for blessing. It is just a glimmer of hope through the gloom of bereavement, but it is a glimmer nevertheless.

"As for me, if I am bereaved, I am bereaved." Finally, Jacob is willing to let the world go on even if he must suffer. His selfish gives way to resignation, and he sends the brothers on their way.

Jacob Confronts His Brothers (43:15 - 45-24)

The brothers return to Egypt, and Joseph is moved to see his brother Benjamin. But he cannot show his feelings now. He must test his brothers once more. What will they do this time when their youngest brother, their father's new beloved son, is threatened? Have they changed? Have they finally repented of what they had done to him?

The brothers return the silver sent back with them by mistake. They do the honest, right thing.

"It is all right," says Joseph. "Don't be afraid. Your God, the God of your father, has given you treasure in your sacks, I received your silver."

Simeon is released from prison, and the brothers are banqueted in Joseph's private quarters, and are then sent home with bags of grain. But Joseph's own silver cup is secretly placed in the mouth of Benjamin's bag, and their pouches of silver returned again.

No sooner than they have left the city, than they are stopped and searched. Have they taken the missing cup? The cup is found in Benjamin's sack and the boy is taken into custody to become a slave.

The brothers "tore their clothes." They themselves had sold Joseph into slavery, but now when Benjamin is taken into slavery they are visibly moved.

Judah now goes up to Joseph to plead with him for Benjamin's life.

"If the boy is not with us when I go back to your servant my father, and if my father, whose life is closely bound up with the boy's life, sees the boy isn't there, he will die. Your servants will bring the gray head of our father down to the grave in sorrow" (44:30-31)

Judah offers his own life in exchange for the life of the boy. "How can I go back to my father if the boy is not with me? No! Do not let me see the misery that would come upon my father."

Joseph can bear it no longer. His brothers have changed. They care about their father. They care about their brother. He orders all his servants out of the room and begins to weep. "I am Joseph!" he tells his brothers. "Is my father really still alive?"

His brothers are terrified. Their brother whom they had sold into slavery now has them fully in his power, and none can deliver them. They don't know what to do.

"Come here," says Joseph, and proceeds to tell them an astonishing thing.

"Do not be angry with yourselves for selling me here," he tells them, "because it was to save lives that God sent me ahead of you.... God sent me ahead of you to preserve for you a remnant on earth and to save your lives by a great deliverance. So then, it was not you who sent me here but God" (45:5-8).

Seldom does a person see the big picture in his lifetime, but Joseph could see it. Ever since his brothers had appeared the year before seeking food to keep their families from starving, Joseph had begun to understand what his real purpose was.

Here was the Blessing of Abraham again. This wasn't for Egypt, though God cared for the Egyptians. This wasn't for Joseph's sake, he had power enough. This was God's purpose to raise up a people whom no one could number, and Joseph's part was to keep them from starving and to provide a place for them to grow in number and flourish. This wasn't about Joseph at all, but about God and fulfilling his purposes.

What an amazing insight!

Joseph weeps in his brothers' arms and sends them home to fetch their father to come and live in the best part of Egypt, with the knowing words, "Don't quarrel on the way!" (45:24).

Jacob's Reassurance (45:25 - 46:27)

The jubilant family caravan comes into Jacob's camp, and he rises to meet them -- and to see if Benjamin is with them.

"Joseph is still alive," they shout, "and is ruler of all Egypt!"

Jacob is stunned. Joseph alive? Could he allow himself to even consider the possibility? It would hurt too much to open old wounds if it were not true.

"But it is true," his sons insist, and they tell him Joseph's words and lead him out to the carts Joseph has sent to carry him back.

"The spirit of their father Jacob revived," the Scripture says. A smile breaks out over his long-sad countenance and he laughs. "I'm convinced! My son Joseph is still alive! I will go and see him before I die."

The next days are busy with preparations for the journey. Belongings of a lifetime are packed. Numerous families are gathered and told they will be leaving behind all they have known. Herds are gathered, and the caravan of Jacob and sixty-six sons and grandsons, plus wives and daughters and servants, leaves and heads south.

Jacob stops in Beersheba. Here his grandfather Abraham had sojourned and had called upon the name of the LORD, the Eternal God (21:33). Here the Lord had appeared to Jacob's father Isaac and confirmed to him the promises of Abraham. Here Isaac had built an altar and called on the name of the Lord and dug a well (26:23-25).

And now Jacob, on his way to see his son, stops in Beersheba and calls on the God of his father Isaac (46:1). He offers sacrifices, perhaps on the very altar Isaac had built many years before, and was refreshed from the very well Isaac had dug.

That night God spoke to Jacob (now referred to as "Israel") in a vision:

"Jacob! Jacob!" he calls, using Jacob's given name rather than his exalted name Israel.

"Here I am," replies Jacob.

"I am God, the God of your father. Do not be afraid to go down to Egypt, for I will make you into a great nation there. I will go down to Egypt with you, and will surely bring you back again. And Joseph's own hand will close your eyes" (46:3-4).

When God speaks to us, all we can do is weep.

"Do not be afraid," God says. Jacob's life has been consumed by fear. Fear of Esau, fear of Laban, fear of Esau again, fear of the Canaanites after the destruction of Shechem. Fear of loss. Fear of loneliness. Fear. Fear has gripped him, and now God graciously releases him from its grasp. "Do not be afraid to go down to Egypt," he says.

Jacob has suffered loss after loss. His world has narrowed down until he clings to his youngest son Benjamin, only to have to give him up, too. He has nearly forgotten the promise of God to be with him.

"I will go down to Egypt with you," God promises him, "and will surely bring you back again."

So often we forget the companionship God offers, and turn to our own dwindling resources.

O what peace we often forfeit, O what needless pain we bear,
All because we do not carry everything to God....
Are we weak and heavy laden, Cumbered with a load of care?
Precious Savior, still our refuge, take it to the Lord in prayer.*

"And Joseph's hand will close your eyes."

Jacob has a future again. Like so many elderly people, his life had narrowed down to himself alone. Now his God will go with him, and he will see Joseph, and Joseph himself will be with him when he dies.

Jacob left home the first time with nothing but a staff in his hand. This time when he leaves home he counts a company of people as his descendants and household, including sixty-six sons and grandsons, a total of seventy when they are reunited with Joseph's family in Egypt, plus the wives and daughters and granddaughters and servants. Here is man whom God has tried, but has also blessed -- abundantly.

"Do not be afraid to go down to Egypt," or wherever your path is leading you, says your God, "for I will go down to Egypt with you and will surely bring you back again." Don't be afraid of your future. You have a Friend alongside.

* From the song "What a Friend We Have in Jesus," by Joseph M. Scriven, 1855.