"We share in his sufferings *in order* that we may also share in his glory."-Romans8
Just because we suffer in our 'struggle' at times through the flesh, persecution, or any trials, doesn't mean that we aren't children of God, but that we are supposed to share in his suffering. It doesn't take away from the fact that "the mind controlled by the Spirit is life and peace." Maybe that's where we get confused sometimes.. imagine this, we should find joy in life when we suffer.. does that make sense? Well, Paul said of Jesus, "For the JOY set before him, he *endured* the cross."(Heb 12) Joy and endurance in the same context? That goes against human nature.. God has a way of doing that.
"I want to know Christ and the power of His resurrection, and the fellowship of sharing in His sufferings, becoming like Him in His death."(Phil 3) What if we could actually find pleasure in suffering? An example might be fasting, and maybe that's a good place for us to seek, through prayer and fasting. Seek, and you will find, when you seek with all your heart.