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Q36. Full of Grace


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Q36. (Colossians 4:5-6; 1 Peter 3:8-9, 15; Ephesians 4:29-32) What would be the characteristics of a conversation with an unbeliever that might be termed “full of grace”? What guidelines should rule our ways of speaking? How can we avoid the bad examples set for us by leaders of our culture and our world?

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  • 5 months later...

Q36. (Colossians 4:5-6; 1 Peter 3:8-9, 15; Ephesians 4:29-32)

What would be the characteristics of a conversation with an unbeliever that might be termed "full of grace"?

What guidelines should rule our ways of speaking?

How can we avoid the bad examples set for us by leaders of our culture and our world?

 

The conversation must be such that no offense is felt or taken because of the words used.  Use words that build up rather than break down, gracious words.  Let your speech be open and friendly and not defensive , hard and condescending.

We should be gentle and respectful in the way we speak to others, irrespective of what they deserve.

Avoid  replying to every criticism with an insult.

"Do not repay evil with evil or insult with insult, but with blessing, because to this you were called so that you may inherit a blessing." (1 Peter 3:9)

     
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I will put Compassion and Humility as the characteristics that I hope to have in my heart when I am in front of someone that needs to hear about Jesus Christ.  I must be humble, taking the lower position and managing the conversation, so that the person’s defenses won’t rise up and shut down the conversation.  If I’m speaking to someone, I probably have some idea of who they are, so my heart should also fill with compassion for them. I know where I will be for eternity.  Can I now use this opportunity to plant a seed that might germinate, giving God a chance to open their eyes and soften their hearts.

As for guidelines for ANY conversation, try to live by Luke 6:45: “A good man brings good things out of the good stored up in his heart, and an evil man brings evil things out of the evil stored up in his heart. For the mouth speaks what the heart is full of.”  If you approach the moment with love and grace, you will feel the good in you, and your mouth will speak what your heart holds dear.

As for the last point, do NOT behave like most of the current group of leaders in this world.  Many are evil, most are liars and all are greedy.  They routinely place their personal gain and self-promotion above their responsibility to care for/care about the people they are responsible for.  Each week the global situation gets worse.  This is not the forum to go any deeper into the current state of affairs, so I won’t.

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Q36. (Colossians 4:5-6; 1 Peter 3:8-9, 15; Ephesians 4:29-32) What would be the characteristics of a conversation with an unbeliever that might be termed "full of grace"? What guidelines should rule our ways of speaking? How can we avoid the bad examples set for us by leaders of our culture and our world?

One that is filled with gracious and loving words. Words that are friendly and warm and not hateful or critical. Words that draw the hearer in and make the person want to know more. Words that are not offensive or judgemental at all.

 

Words that would speak about how ones life is characterized by love since one has found Jesus. Words that express how ones life has changed since knowing Jesus as Savior. Words that are spoken in love and genuine concern for the lost one and not be self-serving at all. Our words should be respectful and spoken in gentleness. We should not force our faith on them either if they are not interested but pray for the Holy Spirit to speak to them. We need to reach them where they are at and try to identify with them.We need to see them through the eyes of the Lord or God our Father. They are people who need Him and people who are hurting and lost. We cannot preach at them but tell them about what God has done for us. We should always pay attention to the Spirit's leading in our converstions with them. And most assuredly we need to live out what we talk about.

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Q36. (Colossians 4:5-6; 1 Peter 3:8-9, 15; Ephesians 4:29-32) What would be the characteristics of a conversation with an unbeliever that might be termed “full of grace”? What guidelines should rule our ways of speaking? How can we avoid the bad examples set for us by leaders of our culture and our world?

Compassionate, nonjudgmental, loving, caring and empathetic.

Don’t preach, don’t judge. By asking questions we can avoid doing all the talking and getting preachy

By not judging and condemning others because they don’t believe as we do. “All have sinned and fall short of the glory of God” Romans 3:23

 

 

 

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  • What would be the characteristics of a conversation with an unbeliever that might be termed "full of grace"?

    The conversation would be empathetic, non-judgmental, full of hope.   There could be enough information to engage the non-believer and point him/her in the direction of a church or group where the questions they may have would be answered.  The responsibility is with us.  Not so much information or rules that the listener would turn away.  Further, the most impressive conversations I've been in are with believers who are rock solid in their belief of Jesus. This demeanour draws people to them;  interests them in learning more.  For our parts, our side of the conversation should be full of this reflection of love and His glorification and graciousness which flows from us to the unbeliever.

 

  • What guidelines should rule our ways of speaking?

    Follow the commandments:  Love God, Love your neighbour.  Speak in the manner that you would want others to speak to you:  with respect and love, not participating in the squabbling and judgment that the rest of the world does.

     
  • How can we avoid the bad examples set for us by leaders of our culture and our world?

    Avoid watching them.  There is very little that they can say or do that would be of paramount importance.  We can read and update ourselves with the state of the nation and the world without wasting time watching the antics that are so political.  Also, engage your mind with Biblical studies, Christian books and group engagements.  There are so many hours in the day.  If we fill them with Biblical materials, a good part would be active in refreshing your mind. Finally, I think that Christianity is an active and not passive pursuit.  That being the case, join a Christian movement/find an opportunity that is based upon Christian principles and influence your environment, make a different in the world, being an ambassador but also, paying forward rewards I heaven.  God wants us to bless others as He blesses us.  This is a worthy, eternal pursuit and unfortunately, we will never run short of opportunities where we can reach out to others less fortunate.
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The world is overwhelmingly secular so we deal with "outsiders" every day. We engage in an insider-talk and an outsider-talk. Outsider talk is cautious and geared toward moving the conversation in such a way that there are opportunities to say a word, or two, about the gospel. Sometimes more. I do not think Christians need to wait for opportunities to talk about Christ but rather, Christians should actively make those opportunities. 

Yes, God gives opportunities to us. Thankfully.

Our speech should be honest. If there's one quality that separates seculars from Christians it's honesty. In my experience, seculars often grind against the gospel at the same time they begrudgingly admire us for our honesty. We should strive to be the opposite of our public relations dominated, propagandistic Western governments -- we should be transparent, honest and forthright about our faith, values and outlooks.

I do think there's a place for arguing and juxtaposing our values and beliefs to those of seculars. When Jesus went into the temple and overturned the tables, he wasn't gentle or respectful but was drawing a line between godly and ungodly behavior; he wasn't building up the money-changers but exposing them. 

I agree with the poster upthread (Diane D) that we should simply avoid being inundated by negative and damaging politics. I do this all the time. There's a point of saturation where information is a spiritual depressive. Having said this, some of us are called by God to plunge into the fray, to battle, not avoid, to be active, not passive, to counter, and not acquiesce in gentle and gracious speech.

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Q36. (Colossians 4:5-6; 1 Peter 3:8-9, 15; Ephesians 4:29-32) 
What would be the characteristics of a conversation with an unbeliever that might be termed "full of grace"? What guidelines should rule our ways of speaking? How can we avoid the bad examples set for us by leaders of our culture and our world?
In our conversation with unbelievers, we should make the most of the opportunity to tell them the Good News of salvation. This must be done gently, courteously, respectfully, and humbly. We can tell them about the great things the Lord has done for us. But, when speaking about our Saviour and Lord there should be no trace of harshness or bitterness; rather our conversation must be honest and without hypocrisy – always full of grace. If not, this can result in just the opposite desired effect by turning unbelievers away from Christ. We should always be ready to encourage one another and build each other up. There is no room in our conversation for resentment, unwillingness to forgive, burst of rage, anger, hostility, insulting language, slander, abusive speech, meanness or wishing evil on others. Just the opposite should characterise our speech. Being creatures in Christ we should be displaying supernatural virtues of kindness, tender-heartedness, and forgiveness. We should never forget the work of Jesus Christ at Calvary – the abundant grace He showers on us. Being believers, we have received a new heart (2 Cor 5:17), and our nature has given way to living a life of harmony, compassion, love, and humility. We avoid the bad examples our leaders have shown us. Gone are our old self of self-centredness, our aggressive behaviour, our retaliation of evil with evil, and insult with insult. Instead, we bless those who mistreat us, and repay insult with kindness. We now have a heart sensitive to the needs and feelings of others, even looking for opportunities to help them. 
 

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Q36. (Colossians 4:5-6; 1 Peter 3:8-9, 15; Ephesians 4:29-32) What would be the characteristics of a conversation with an unbeliever that might be termed "full of grace"?

It is conversation in which we respond in love and grace to hash and high handed criticism or abuse.

What guidelines should rule our ways of speaking?

We should be like Jesus Christ in all respect and in grace and love.

How can we avoid the bad examples set for us by leaders of our culture and our world?

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Our conversation should be full of gentleness and respect. Even if we know the correct answer when speaking to the unbeliever, we should not be arrogant and think that we have all the correct answers. We need to be humble and not be quick to answer as some of us normally do. 

We should be guided by love when engaging with any person whether they are believers or not. Always have an ear to listen to their needs or concerns and be willing to assist where possible.

What most the leaders of our culture and our world display are far-fetched from what Christ portrayed as the King of this world. We must emulate Christ in our deeds and talk. We must understand that we came to serve and not to be served as most leaders expect. Have compassion and show grace at all times. 

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Q36. (Colossians 4:5-6; 1 Peter 3:8-9, 15; Ephesians 4:29-32) What would be the characteristics of a conversation with an unbeliever that might be termed “full of grace”? What guidelines should rule our ways of speaking? How can we avoid the bad examples set for us by leaders of our culture and our world?

1. To have a conversation speaking with gentleness, compassion, love, allowing grace to be seen and being humble. 

2. Speaking with love as we are gentle and kind. Allowing the other person to speak and letting them know we are listening to understand how we can be a help.

3. We can avoid the bad examples by reading God's word, praying, and doing what the bible says. Not judging someone because of their ungodly ways, but loving them.

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The characteristics of a conversation with an unbeliever would be a winning quality or attractiveness that invites a favorable reaction, we are to gracious in our speech toward them.

Our guidelines in speaking to unbelievers should be gracious and attractive avoiding negative speech and examples.

 We can avoid bad examples set for us by our culture and world by not repaying evil for evil or insult with an insult. We are to humble, sympathetic, affectionate and compassionate.    

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A conversation with an unbeliever should be gentle and respectful, friendly, seasoned with salt and full of humility. While we are speaking we must be open and friendly, be ready to listen patiently and do not dismiss their words without proper discussion. We must always be gracious, using words to build the other person up and to bless them. We must not repay evil with evil, or use insults, if we are offended or annoyed by what is being said. We have a choice to make: are we going to be an out pourer of love and grace, or a vessel full of hate and insults. 

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Grace should be shown in our conversations, especially with those who are not Christians. We are to treat them with gentleness and respect. We should take full advantage of every opportunity we are given in conversing with those who don't know Christ. We are called to be gracious in our speech toward outsiders. Gentleness and respect should be our hallmark. We are also to show respect before our adversaries. We should be like Jesus, and emulate the grace he shows toward us, even though we don't deserve it. Jesus taught us to love our enemies and in this way we can avoid bad examples of our culture and the world. By showing grace we become true sons of our heavenly Father and adopt his value system of grace and mercy (Luke 6:35-36). Grace should be shown in our conversations, especially with those who are not Christians. We are to treat them with gentleness and respect (Colossians 4:5-6; 1 Peter 3:15)

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  • 3 months later...

The characteristic of a conversation with an unbeliever should be like talking with a friend. You would not offend them but offer them loving and kind words. The rule that we should follow when we speak is to speak gently. We don’t have to emulate our leaders’ words but we can speak kind those that are cursing us.

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  • 4 weeks later...

Q36. (Colossians 4:5-6; 1 Peter 3:8-9, 15; Ephesians 4:29-32) What would be the characteristics of a conversation with an unbeliever that might be termed “full of grace”? What guidelines should rule our ways of speaking? How can we avoid the bad examples set for us by leaders of our culture and our world?
 

A conversation with an unbeliever termed full of Grace should include responding to them as we believe Jesus would. We’re instructed to offer both grace and salt. And we’re commanded to love our neighbors as well as our enemies—so response should edify, build up, offer blessing, and point to hope.

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