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Q1. (Ephesians 6:1-3)

What kind of obedience and honour is appropriate for adult children to show towards their parents?

What might be the exceptions?

How do respect and forgiveness figure in this relationship?

Parents are mostly more mature and have had many life experiences and they can pass on valuable insight and advice to their children. We often find adult children can be immature, impulsive, and inexperienced, and they should submit to the authority of parents, who are older and wiser. Therefore children should respect and honour their parents; they should relate to each other with thoughtfulness and love. Of course this is all done only in obedience to our Heavenly Father. Both parents and children must respect each other; and have the other

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(Ephesians 6:1-3) What kind of obedience and honor is appropriate for adult children to show towards their parents?

Paul call for "Children to obey your parents in the Lord" which is a command for them to subordinate themselves to listen and follow their parents words. Obedience to parents is part of obedience to the Lord although obedience to the Lord is the 1st obligation for a child. Obedience is not a man made rule, but a command of God to be woven into the fabric of a child's morality (hopefully).

The lesson shows Deuteronomy 5:16 "Honor your father and mother" takes a slightly different path. Honoring is not obedience but is an obligation until our parents die. Obedience transforms to honoring with adulthood and marriage (Genesis 2:24)

What might be the exceptions? How do respect and forgiveness figure in this relationship?

I was blessed to have a father and mother who loved me and who raised me to follow the rules and tell the truth. The church played a scarce role in my upbringing. My father was a heroic military officer and the best of the best as a fathr. He was always there for me. His death at 60 was the hardest thing I faced in my life. Unfortunately, my mother suffered from lifelong emotional problems that were taken out on my brother, father and me. My mother is in a nursing home now, but still tries to control with emotional warfare on my brother and I. It is a difficult situation; but my brother and I honor her and have for the last 20 years despite her attempts to beat us up. I am baring my soul a little here, but I know other people live in this situation. We have forgiven Mom and will always continue to help her..........it just takes prayer and God's help. Praise be to God for he is my refuge.

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  • 9 months later...

Q1. (Ephesians 6:1-3) What kind of obedience and honor is appropriate for adult children to show towards their parents? What might be the exceptions? How do respect and forgiveness figure in this relationship?

Complete obedience and honor. There are no exceptions! We must always respect our parents whether they make the right decisions or not and when they do something that is hurtful or make a wrong decision we must forgive as Christ has forgiven us.

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  • 1 month later...

Q1. (Ephesians 6:1-3) What kind of obedience and honor is appropriate for adult children to show towards their parents? What might be the exceptions? How do respect and forgiveness figure in this relationship?

honor thy parents. I always loved my father. They did everything for me. I really miss them both..There isn't a day that I do not think of them... Every sunday I pray for them at mass.

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  • 2 months later...

Q1. (Ephesians 6:1-3) What kind of obedience and honor is appropriate for adult children to show towards their parents? What might be the exceptions? How do respect and forgiveness figure in this relationship?

1. What kind of obedience and honor is appropriate for adult children to show thwards their parents?

Jesus quotes the Fifth Commandment when he castigates the Pharisees for creating legal ways to evade supporting their parents when they were aged (Mark 7:9-13). Proverbs is full of admonitions to honor parents both as children (Proverbs 1:8-9; 15:5) and as adults (Proverbs 20:20; 23:22-25; 28:24; 30:11, 17). We have a duty to honor, listen to, and care for them that extends beyond childhood.

2. What might be the exceptions? How do respect and forgiveness figure in this relationship?

We must always respect our parents; my mother left me in a house alone, she took my little brother and sister and moved away. I was alone and had to work while going to school and I never had things like the other kids because it was only me until my grandmother got a call about it. I did not understand and I don't think that I truly understand today why she left me but I did forgive me after a long time and we did regain our relationship before she left this world. My father was never in my life and has never tried to help me in any way but I do not hold that against him. I pray for him as I did and still do for my mother.

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  • 7 months later...

Q1. (Ephesians 6:1-3) What kind of obedience and honor is appropriate for adult children to show towards their parents? What might be the exceptions? How do respect and forgiveness figure in this relationship?

The obligation of obedience becomes obsolete when adult children form a new family but we are always to honor our parents and care for them. We have that obligation until death.

The exception might be if there is a conflict in faith and morals then it is better for the adult child to obey and honor God than to listen to the parents.

Respect should always form a vital part of this relationship and as for forgiveness is necessary if an adult child wants to prosper and have a long life.

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Q1. (Ephesians 6:1-3) What kind of obedience and honor is appropriate for adult children to show towards their parents? What might be the exceptions? How do respect and forgiveness figure in this relationship?

The obligation of obedience becomes obsolete when adult children form a new family but we are always to honor our parents and care for them. We have that obligation until death.

The exception might be if there is a conflict in faith and morals then it is better for the adult child to obey and honor God than to listen to the parents.

Respect should always form a vital part of this relationship and as for forgiveness is necessary if an adult child wants to prosper and have a long life.

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  • 7 months later...

14a)The kind of obedience and honour that adult children should show to their parents is to listen,value and respect them and care for them as they grow older.When marry & form new family,obligation to obey parents is different,always need to respect & consider their advice, and make decisions right for family within God’s guidance

b)If parents mentally challenged Their thinking is impaired, but need to not be harsh, but gently care for them,guide,care for them and always show them respect.

C)We don’t always understand our parents motives, but as part of honouring them we must show respect for them,and seek to forgive them if they have hurt us, out of sacrificial love for them.

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  • 4 months later...

The kind of obedience and honor that is appropriate for adult children to show towards their parents is that of respect. They should stay in contact with them and help them whenever they can. The exceptions might be when they are asking you to do something that is immoral and against the beliefs in the bible. Respect and forgiveness is one of the most parts of this relationship.

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  • 1 year later...

Q1. (Ephesians 6:1-3) What kind of obedience and honor is appropriate for adult children to show towards their parents? What might be the exceptions? How do respect and forgiveness figure in this relationship?

It is appropriate for adult children to obey their parents while they are under the care and up bring of their parents. After adult hood they still need to respect and obey their parents.

They are adults now and should not have to rely on parents for their mishaps in life. They are to honor and care for their parents as long as they live. They should not have to depend on others to care for their parents in old age, unless medical problems require other wise, this would be the an exception to the care of them or perhaps they themselves are incapable of caring for them.

We are to respect and honor them for as long as they live. As children they forgave us of our mistakes. Basic respect for our parents also teaches us that we are to respect and honor God our Creator, who through His love and grace for us, forgives us of our mistakes against Him.       

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  • 1 year later...

I believe that adult children need to follow their parents rules as long as they are living in the parents house. However, the children should be mindful to always follow the teachings and rules of the bible first and foremost. Parents are not perfect, however, the children should honor them for giving life to them and also they need to be able to forgive their parents for any mistakes the parents might have made in the past. 

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  • 2 years later...
On 9/15/2006 at 1:56 PM, Pastor Ralph said:

Q1. (Ephesians 6:1-3) What kind of obedience and honor is appropriate for adult children to show towards their parents? What might be the exceptions? How do respect and forgiveness figure in this relationship?

Respecting them, listening to them caring for them.

The exception  is when it is not of the Lord.

All the time.

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  • Pastor Ralph changed the title to Q54. Adult Children
  • 2 months later...

Q54. (Ephesians 6:1-3) What kind of obedience and honour is appropriate for adult children to show towards their parents? What might be the exceptions? How do respect and forgiveness figure in this relationship? 
Once adult children have left their parents’ home they are not obliged to obey their parents, but of course they will listen if there is good advice being given. Since parents are mostly more mature and have had many life experiences, they can pass on valuable insights and advice to their children. Adult children still living at home must obey their parents if not told to do anything immoral. Of course, at all times they are to honour their parents, irrespective of whether they are believers or not. This may even include looking after them if need be, in their old age. Both parents and children must love and respect each other; and have the other’s interest at heart by submitting to each other. Mistakes made on either side should be forgiven and overseen. Parents, not being perfect, might have unwittingly wronged their children; the adult children should forgive them. As they become parents they will come to recognise the responsibilities involved and how easily mistakes can occur. Therefore, ideally children should at all times respect and honour their parents; they should relate to each other with thoughtfulness and love. Of course, this is all done only in obedience to our Heavenly Father. 
 

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Q54. (Ephesians 6:1-3) What kind of obedience and honor is appropriate for adult children to show towards their parents? What might be the exceptions? How do respect and forgiveness figure in this relationship?

Adult children need to obey their parents in the Lord. It thus implies that their obedience is required as long as it is line with word of God.
 

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The type of obedience that adult children should give to their parents is to care about them and for them. This can be in different ways. Sometimes it might be financially or in other ways. We are to still honor them for the rest of their lives. It does come to a place when you are an adult you can listen to them and honor them but you can't do something or take a direction that goes against what The Lord is telling you to do that's where the line draws. But still be respectful to them at the same time. There is a healthy balance with this. We are to always be respectful and we are to forgive parents even if they were not in our lives as they should had been. God restored my relationship with my Father who wasn't around like he should have been. He is totally different today. Always talking about God.God did it for me he can do it for others. He wants to do it for others. I'm still enjoy that relationship today. Forgiveness is a key.

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  • 2 weeks later...

What kind of obedience and honour is appropriate for adult children to show towards their parents?

What might be the exceptions?

How do respect and forgiveness figure in this relationship?

I am currently caring for my 95-year-old father, a man with whom I have never had a relationship as a child or adult, who rarely spoke to me as a child, with whom I have nothing in common as an adult, is an adamant atheist who often mocks my faith ... and who, at this point, is utterly dependent on me. Caring for him is the hardest thing I've ever done in my life. I feel my own life ticking away as I care for him, so don't always care without feelings of resentment and bitterness. Often, I feel God has abandoned me. I have had to work hard to truly forgive my father, too.

I pray that God's word in Ephesians is manifested in my life, that "it may go well" with me, that I may have a long life to make up for these years. I particularly want a full and big life of challenges, a life of purpose and obedience to His calling. I cry out to God, often, because being here feels like being buried alive. Still, I know that God has used this "down time" with my father to grow me spiritually --  this time has not been wasted. I long to move on and pray to be released in His time. I pray that God notices my very imperfect attempts to honour and love.

I have prayed for my father's salvation for many years. He is too angry and bitter to accept Christ: the Holy Spirit will have to work in his hardened heart. His father was a Presbyterian minister who left the faith and became a politician, then a professor -- a corrupt man whose final wife was one of his decades-younger students. Thus, my father associates corruption and hypocrisy with the church and Christians. These wounds in his heart are both deep and thickly scarred. I pray to be a better person in front of him so he knows, before he dies, at least one person who has been faithful, loyal and gentle toward him. I have not always risen to these standards and worry my witness to Him has been clouded.

I pray that pastor Ralph is correct when he says that to honour is greater than to obey. And I pray this verse in Ephesians can be claimed by Christians today including myself.

 

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  • 4 weeks later...
On 9/15/2006 at 1:56 PM, Pastor Ralph said:

Q54. (Ephesians 6:1-3) What kind of obedience and honor is appropriate for adult children to show towards their parents? What might be the exceptions? How do respect and forgiveness figure in this relationship?

When we are adults and married we don't have to obey them but we are always to honor our parents and care for them. We have this obligation until death.

The exception is, that if a parent asks their child to do something immoral, their first obligation would be to obey the Lord instead of the parent.

We are always to honor and respect and forgive our parents.  They took care of us and supported us and love us.  We should do this in return.  Forgiveness is for all, just as  Christ forgave us.

 

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  • 1 month later...

Making sure that they are appreciated and loved.    This is easier for some siblings than others.   I had to work midnite shift and out of state for a long period of time.  My situation was long distance care giving.  I offered my parents who were getting on in years elder care resources to assist them.  Sadly, the data that I get from my job, was not utilized by my parents.

Make a long story short, I fulfilled this admonition of St Paul.   I gave it my best effort even after my Father passed away.  Even installed a nice monument at the grave of my great grandparents who never had a grave stone.

What is so distressing is when parents or a parent refuses help from an elder care agency that you have researched and found just right.   As a working man on nite shift and not living close to my Mother's house here in NYC area, I desperately tried to convince Mother to accept this wonderfull assistance.  As well as to make my sister's life easier too!

Going through the school of "hard knocks" of elder care, I have asked God to forgive me for my lack of patience and long-suffering.   Being on nites and having some health issues, I wasn't all patient all the time.   Yet I was so desperate to assist my mother.

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  • 3 weeks later...

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